


First Christmas

by TheBlackMagister



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Developing Relationship, M/M, Sweet Negan (Walking Dead), ft a very tired simon, hes kind of a nerd but its ok
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-25
Updated: 2017-12-25
Packaged: 2019-02-20 11:37:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13145886
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheBlackMagister/pseuds/TheBlackMagister
Summary: Negan gifts Rick with a comfy sweater that he secretly knitted.





	First Christmas

**Author's Note:**

> my part in the Regan Secret Santa 2017!!!! hope whoever requested this enjoys :o

 

If there’s one thing Rick’s sure of, it’s that the cold _must_ be the goddamn Devil himself.

He’d never liked winter in Georgia to begin with – but here, in Virginia? He’s only questioned about four times a day since the weather started cooling down if it was really worth it.

Still; he supposes it’s not all bad. Provided their calendar is correct (and there’s no guarantee – but still) Christmas is in the next couple of weeks. Besides, he’s got to admit that seeing the trees coming up in Alexandria is heart-warming. It feels a little unreal that they’re even able to do this; that they’re stable enough to think about _Christmas_ , about gift-giving and trees and dinners.

The only issue he can see is-

“Rick!”

He bites hard on his lower lip to stifle a groan. He’s come to accept the Saviors presence in his town; it had taken more than a few altercations, but eventually they’d been able to reach an agreement. Now – now Negan is still a giant pain in his ass, but instead of being terrifying, he’s just kind of annoying, in a sweet kind of way.

“Negan,” He says coolly, turning to face the older man. “Time again already?”

“Fuck yeah.” Negan grins, clapping a hand on Rick’s shoulder. “Got your shit ready?”

“Mm.”

Rick hums as Negan’s arm slides around his shoulders. Lately he’s been getting used to Negan’s little touches. He thinks maybe he shouldn’t; but then, it’s not like it’s hurting anybody. He feels Negan’s fingers squeeze his shoulder, a friendly little gesture that shouldn’t embarrass Rick as much as it does.

“Place looks nice,” Negan comments, steering Rick down the street to Rick’s house. “All Christmas-y. Forgot how nice that shit feels.”

“Yeah. We thought it might be nice to start settling the kids back into something normal like Christmas, and honestly, it’s..” Rick flushes for a moment, looking almost embarrassed. “Well, you know. It’s really helped cheer everyone up.”

“Yeah?” Negan hums thoughtfully, glancing around. “Even you?”

“Eh.. some.”

Truthfully, it’s not necessarily that he’s embarrassed that he’s happy; it’s moreso the fact that something as small as getting back on schedule has managed to make him happier than he’s been in a very long time. Negan shoots him a curious look but says nothing. He finds his cheeks warming up. Negan’s been oddly concerned about him lately, and even though their as of yet unnamed relationship is going well, he’s always surprised when Negan shows any affection outside of the bedroom.

“So,” Negan says instead of questioning Rick, “you got a special somebody to spend Christmas with?”

Rick snorts a little, kicking at a rock in the path. “No. I can’t really.. you know, focus on more than one person at once.”

Negan at least has the decency to look abashed. His wives have always been the subject of their arguments – but so far, he hasn’t left them, and Rick hasn’t left _him_ , and so they’ve only been going in circles about it.

“Anyway. Which one are _you_ gonna spend it with?” Rick remarks, before Negan can respond, as they enter his house. Negan scuffs his boot against the floor.

“Ah.. well. Figured I’d let ‘m all go back to their families for the holiday.”

His curiosity piqued, Rick glances over, stepping into the kitchen. “Oh?” He inquires, one eyebrow lifting, “Thought you’d at least have _one_. Actually, in that case, uh.. well, um, you know..” He pauses for a moment, long enough for Negan to approach him – leaning on the counter, looking interested.

“Yeah?”

Rick coughs. “I was just thinking.. uh.. maybe you’d.. want to come spend it with us.”

Negan stares at him for a long minute. He doesn’t usually blush – it’s usually Rick doing all the blushing, being flustered – but now there’s a pinkness in his cheeks as he stares blankly at the slighter man.

“It was just an idea,” Rick adds hastily, turning away to grab a glass from the cabinet. “You don’t have to-“

“You,” Negan begins, cutting him off, “you want me here? For Christmas?”

“Well. Yeah.” Rick swallows, carefully filling the glass and taking a drink before turning back to Negan. “I _do_ like having you around, dumbass. Sometimes.”

“Rick, I..” Negan hesitates. “I don’t know.. what to say.”

“Like I said. You don’t have to. Just. Uh. Thought you might.. want to.”

“No, no, I didn’t say that. I’m just.. surprised, is all.. but – I mean – i-if you want me to, I will.”

Rick’s never seen Negan so embarrassed. He’s very pointedly staring at a spot just over Rick’s head, the flush in his face even more pronounced now. Rick smiles a little shyly, slipping up in front of him and touching his cheek.

“You’re not going to have a heart attack in my kitchen, are you?” Rick teases gently, and Negan’s gaze falls to his.

“Ah – no.” Negan grins sheepishly, hand falling to Rick’s jaw. “I’m alright, sorry. Gimmie a kiss?”

Rick obliges, reaching up to press a sweet kiss to Negan’s lips. He can feel Negan chuckling into it, one hand carding through his curls, and after a moment of enjoyment Negan pulls back.

“I’m gonna piss, and then I’ll get out of your hair,” He says lightly, and Rick nods.

“Okay.”

* * *

 

Once out of Rick’s sight, Negan quickly ascends the stairs, two at a time. He’s got to do this fast, before Rick gets suspicious. He ducks into Rick’s bedroom and shuffles through the drawers of the dresser. He could probably come up with an assortment of reasons he’s in here, but – he’d rather it not come to that.

He snags one of the t-shirts, one that Rick won’t miss, and tucks it in his jacket pocket. For a long moment, he considers taking another – just to be sure he’s sizing right – but he decides it would be a little much, and he quickly closes the drawer and leaves. As he descends the staircase he catches Rick humming, carefully making a sandwich, and he leans on the doorframe for a moment to watch.

“Babe,” He says idly, when Rick doesn’t notice him for several moments. Rick turns, blue eyes going round with surprise.

“Oh! Sorry, I – I didn’t realize-“

“No, no, don’t apologize. It was cute.” Negan grins, catching his tongue between his teeth, at Rick’s embarrassed flush. “I’m just on my way out.”

“Ah.. okay.” Rick clears his throat, fingers reaching up to comb through the curls at the base of his neck. “Okay.”

He steps up and presses a quick kiss to Negan’s mouth. Negan hums contentedly. Rick’s pink when he pulls back, but his blue eyes are gentle, and there’s a little smile playing at the corners of his lips.

“Go,” He murmurs affectionately. “I’ll see you at Christmas. Two weeks from today.”

“Yeah.” Negan finds his throat is sticky, and he swallows hard. “Christmas.”

When he gets outside the cold air stings his skin – but honestly, he welcomes it. It helps to clear his head. As he approaches the truck, he breathes in the frost and tries to convince himself this is a good idea. Everything will be fine.

“Why do you look so.. you know, like you just sucked on a lemon?” Simon says, as he hops into the cab of the truck. He scowls.

“It’s nothin’. Just..” He huffs, pulling Rick’s shirt out of his jacket pocket. Simon’s eyebrows shoot up incredulously.

“You stole – the _hell_ , man?”

“It’s not as creepy as it seems, promise. Just, ah.. I.. I have an idea.. something I want to give Rick for Christmas. Listen, just. Fuckin’ trust me on this one. Okay?”

Simon is still frowning skeptically, but after a pause he shrugs. “Whatever. Just.. don’t get me involved. Please.”

“Wasn’t planning on it.” Negan kicks his feet up on the dash, procures a cigarette from somewhere within his jacket, and lights up. “And turn on some fucking music, will you? It’s too damn quiet, I can hear myself think.”

When they reach the Sanctuary, he hops out of the cab and all but jogs toward the building. He hears Simon call after him – but, eh, Simon knows how to unload, he’s sure, and he only waves over his shoulder.

He takes the staircase two steps at a time until he reaches his floor. He wrenches open the door to the lounge room, earning the attention of the women inside.

He takes a moment to catch his breath. Then he straightens, peering around at them, and says, “Any of you girls know how to knit?”

It takes a while, but eventually he gets the hang of it. The first few tries his fingers _really_ do not like the needles. However – he is goddamn determined to do this, even if he has to give up some sleep. Even if it’s not perfect. And his girl – she’s a saint, she’s so patient with him.

He works himself to the bone over the next two weeks, but fuck if he’s not proud at the end. He thinks, with the time he had, he’s done the best he can. He adds the final touches on the ride over to Alexandria; his hands are shaking a little, and although the fabric is soft and tightly woven under his fingertips, he can’t help but be afraid it’s not good enough.

He’s never wanted to impress someone so badly. With Lucille, it had been easy. They hadn’t been big on gifts – each other’s company was enough. Rick, though.. their relationship has been tumultuous at best, and really, he can’t tell if Rick genuinely likes him or just.. pities him.

He’s all but blind, striding through the streets of Alexandria, until he reaches Rick’s house. He hesitates, fist inches from the door. Fuck. Fuck fuck fuck. He lets his knuckles fall against the wood, then stands back.

It’s only a moment before Rick’s opening the door. There’s a smudge of what appears to be flour just above his left eyebrow, but he looks excited all the same, dragging Negan in by the hand. Negan laughs low in his chest.

“Hey there, cowboy. Didn’t think you’d be so happy to see me.”

“I’m not,” Rick says, so clearly lying Negan almost chides him on it. “I need your help cooking.”

Negan chuckles, catching a hand around Rick’s waist. “Woah there, baby. Got a fucking gift for you first.”

Rick looks bemused for a hot second before Negan’s dragging him upstairs. When they reach Rick’s bedroom, Negan withdraws the t-shirt first – Rick lets out a little “hey!” – then, hesitantly, hands shaking, he withdraws the sweater.

It’s a light blue that’s the same color as Rick’s eyes – and finding the yarn had been a pain in the ass. Rick’s eyes go round, pretty mouth falling open in surprise.

“I, uh. Saw you shivering last time I was here. And..” Negan breaks off, scratching the back of his neck. Rick carefully takes the sweater, turning it over in his hands and running his fingers along the fabric.

Slowly – and with all the grace of a newborn deer – Rick tugs it on over his head. He looks even more stunning than Negan had imagined; and for a moment, Negan feels as though all air has escaped the room.

He turns in a careful circle, stretching and twisting to test drive it. Then he turns back to Negan, a shy, delicate smile tugging the corners of his lips.

“It’s wonderful, Negan,” He says softly, and Negan all but melts with relief. “Thank you. Did you.. make it?”

“Ah – well – you know.” Negan scuffs the floor with his boot, biting back his own sheepish grin. “I, um.. had a little help. Knitting isn’t really my thing.. but, you know, close enough, right?”

Rick crosses the room, and for a moment Negan panics – at least until Rick’s mouth is closing over his own, sweet and coaxing. He lets his arms drop around Rick’s waist, tugging the slighter man in.

“So you gonna model it for me, or what?” He mumbles into the kiss, and Rick withdraws a little, one eyebrow raised.

“Thought I already was.”

“ _Just_ the sweater.” Negan corrects, grinning slyly, and Rick gives him an affectionate shove.

“Jeez, Negan,” Rick drawls, pulling further away and beginning to cross the room again. “Gonna make me think you only want me for my body or somethin’.”

Only want-

The thought sinks into Negan’s stomach like a stone. He knows Rick’s joking, of course he does, but it strikes a nerve deep in him that nearly makes him cringe. The thought of losing Rick – of using him for something as stupid as sex – is almost crushing.

“Rick,” He says hollowly, and though he doesn’t remember telling himself to, he strides forward and grabs Rick around the arm, spins the man around and puts him against the wall. “Tell me you don’t – you don’t believe that.”

Rick looks alarmed at his sudden mood change, blue eyes wide. “Negan? What do you-“

“ _Rick_ ,” Negan repeats, and although his voice is firmer this time, he can’t help the note of desperation that slips out. Rick holds both hands up.

“Of course I don’t believe that. Every time I’m around you look like a lovesick puppy. Negan – are you okay?”

“I – I’m fine.” Negan steps back, allowing Rick to move away. “Sorry.”

Rick gives him a look, full of pity – but also something else. Something akin to.. adoration, maybe? Negan’s voice sticks in his throat as Rick starts to head to the stairs, and he can’t stop thinking about his lover’s swaying hips, and those damningly blue eyes, always looking at him so sweet, and the way Rick caresses his face sometimes – and he comes to a split second decision that he’s sure will bite him in the ass in the end, but he doesn’t care, it’s fucking _Christmas_.

“I’m going to leave my wives,” He says to Rick’s back, his voice sounding thin and sad even to himself. Rick stops, turns slowly on his heel.

“What?”

“Just. I know it upsets you that I’m still with them, and I don’t – I don’t want to upset you anymore. So.”

Negan clears his throat. Rick is staring at him with something that looks a little like awe, and he barely has time to register the slighter man moving before he’s given an armful of Rick. Rick’s got his face buried in Negan’s shoulder, clutching at his leather jacket, and for a moment Negan worries he’s crying.

“Thank you,” Rick mumbles, and his voice is as strong and clear as ever. “Negan, I can’t.. thank you.”

“Well, I mean. You know. Rick, you – I mean – you make me want to be better. My girls.. they’re sweethearts, but you make me happier than all of them. So it’s.. it’s just. What needs to happen. Fuck, Rick, I-“

“I know,” Rick mumbles. “Merry Christmas, asshole.”

“Merry Christmas, Rick.” He lets out a long breath, squeezes Rick tighter. “Yeah. Merry fucking Christmas.”


End file.
